If the Scene Sucks, it's Probably Your Fault

I've been listening for years now to the incessant pissing bitching and moaning, mostly from band members, about how the Baltimore/DC live music scene just sucks worse than anything has ever sucked before. They like to bitch, but if the music scene sucks, it's usually a a safe bet that its musicians are to blame. They'd rather complain than take any steps to fix the problem.

#1
Support local music, not just your own band.
I can't count how many bands I've heard bitch about how they just can't get any of their friends in the many other bands they know to come out and support them at their shows. But they themselves never go out to any shows that they aren't playing! Maybe they don't understand the need to engender goodwill with other bands. Good relations with other bands come in handy sooner or later; in the form of gigs, contacts or even just reciprocal support from those same bands. It doesn't always work, and you'll always have those assholes who never reciprocate any support or aid anyone gives them. However, being one of those assholes never does any good for anyone. So if you're not playing out on a given night, and it's remotely feasible, go out and catch one of your fellow Baltimore/DC bands on stage, and bring a friend or two if you can.

Also, leaving the club as soon as your set is finished and not sticking around for any of the other bands, is a great way to display for the whole world just what a self centered prick you are.

#2
Fuck art. This is a business.
And it only works if you treat it as such. A certain degree of professionalism is appreciated, and expected. I'm not talking about anything complicated here, folks. For the most part it boils down to two things: Show up and don't do anything stupid.

Show up for your gigs. Nothing infuriates club owners and promoters more than no-shows and last minute cancellations. It's a good way to shorten the list of places you can play. If you confirm a gig, and are advertised on a bill for a month, then short of hospitalization there ain't a whole lot of acceptable excuses for cancelling less than a week before the show. Much less the day of the show itself. Each person who shows up to see you and then turns around and leaves when the doorman tells them you cancelled, is lost revenue that the promoter could have remedied ahead of time if he knew you weren't serious. It's also kind of shitty to your fans, who made the effort to come out and catch your set just to find out you flaked.

Beyond just showing up, try to do so on time and with all your ducks in a row. Having all your instruments is a big help. Sound silly? You'd be amazed how many bands show up at a club minus an amp, kick pedals, even guitars, and then act shocked when the club doesn't have one just sitting around that they can use.

Don't try to get your underage friends or relatives in. If it was up to club owners and promoters, all shows would be all ages shows. We're not too keen on the thought of turning away potential customers. The 21 age limits on these clubs are a matter of local law, and the penalties brought down on a club owner for violating them are harsh. It's not worth getting fined or even shut down just to accomodate your drummer's 19 year old girlfriend. This goes for band members too. If you know the club has a 21 limit, and you know you have an underage band member, then don't confirm the gig!

Above all, don't be a dick. Copping an attitude, starting fights, breaking or vandalizing club property does nothing but make it harder for bands in that area to land gigs and play out. This is particularly true for hXc bands, who have a bad enough (if somewhat undeseved) reputation on the east coast as it is.

#3
Don't kid yourself: you ain't a rockstar.
There are too many dorks out there who seem to think that their oh-so-wonderful tunes and self perceived abundance of talent somehow entitles them to some special treatment. When pondering how much talent is actually worth in and of itself, it helps to remember this: Faith No More, Gravity Kills and Big Country were all one-hit-wonders; the Spice Girls were an international sensation.

No matter how good you think you are, no matter how good you actually are, you're not getting any more money than you generate for the club. Clubs cannot and will not operate at a loss. There are some folks out there, like Motel Hell Entertainment or Kenny Lee at Mad Mac's, who do this more as a hobby and are satisfied with minimal profits, but even we won't lose money on you. If only five people come out to see you, don't act insulted when your pay for the night sucks.

#4
This isn't the high school lunch room
Sure, it's always nice to play a show with bands you know well and are fiends with. But in the end, you signed on to perform at an event, not to hang out at a social. Don't confirm gigs just because your buddies are on the bill. Don't cancel just because they do. In fact, playing with different bands can prove useful. Playing with different bands usually means playing in front of different fans, which (for all the geniuses out there) is how you expand your fanbase. If you want to hang with your buddies, invite them over for a beer.

That's it for now. I'll write more the next time something irritates the shit out of me.